Excess Mercy
by Heidi Ahlmen
Summary: Ghosts from the past, an enemy within. Takes place during NJO.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars or any of the characters. I am not making money with this.  
  
Only to be archived at Fanfiction.net. All other sites: email me first at siirma6@surfeu.fi to gain permission.  
  
Notes: I apologize for the fact that this story remains unfinished. SW is not my forte - my SW works only mark a period in my writing career when I simply did not have enough inspiration to carry on with my Tomb Raider writings.  
  
Star Wars: Excess Mercy  
  
By Heidi Ahlmen  
  
Part I / III Into The Fire  
  
Bonfires raged on the beach. Outside their sphere of red-yellow flames pouring ashes up in the skies like diminished volcanoes it was so dark it seemed palpable, velvety. City lights had long since gone out, perhaps for good, it seemed. Urbanized but traditional populace of the planet had been forced to return to the old ways.  
  
And tonight the fires would rage for the last time. There were few things to be burned, only the last mementos that were to be banished before the invaders came. For noone wished to leave them anything, as if the very touch of them would infect memories, twist and distort.  
  
And come they would. The usually starry sky now manifested bright flares like meteor showers - battle in-system raged on as the scarce New Republic force that could be spared raced against time not to prevail but to buy some precious time for those who'd been left last on the surface.  
  
For some this was goodbye to their homeworld. For some it would only mean saying farewell forever to loved ones as some had vowed to stay and face inevitable extinction in the hands of the Yuuzhan Vong.  
  
A weary woman paced the moonlit beach, silently stepping barefoot in the moist sand. Reaching out with her senses, she could almost sense the cy'eens - the last ones whalelike creatures that inhabited the oceans. The Yuuzhan Vong - she'd never got to calling them 'vong' as she felt a pet name would belittle the threat they posed - had cut off all the major trade routes during the last six standard months, and the starving populace were forced to overrule the conservation laws protecting the fragile, long-ago overexploited fauna.  
  
The cy'een had been special to her. Strong, agile animals with a wild spirit and an open mind. She'd been the only one who dared to ride them. Until her Master had swept her off to make her Jedi. Back when the old ways had been the everyday ways.  
  
During her long absence - unnaturally long as she'd had her fair share of uncanny adventures - her homeworld had modernized under the New Republic.  
  
For the current inhabitants this was a downturn in evolution. For her it felt like home - returning to tradition. Suddenly old songs were sung again, artificial clothing materials abandoned, skyscrapers abandoned, only necessary chores performed.  
  
She stopped for a moment to stare out into the ocean. Even with her abilities she could not see past the black surface as the bonfires contrasted her vision. People sat around them, laughing and chattering. But she could feel they weren't enjoying themselves.  
  
It reminded her of what an old acquointance had once told her about Rebel Alliance parties prior to battles. The participants had felt obliged to have a blast of a time for those who had perished.  
  
Tomorrow, she'd feel like a rebel too, escaping this world that was coming into the clutches of an evil empire in the making.  
  
She felt only hollow sadness for having to leave this planet. It was home as a place, but the people that had made it into the place of her memories were dead. Her family had not seen her return, and Jan, her husband, was a recent casualty of war.  
  
The hems of the whitish dress were not soaked, but she ignored the moist, clinging fabric that gathered dust and sand off the beach as she hurried to join the biggest of the bonfires.  
  
There was nothing for her here anymore. And after Jan, she felt she had filled whatever purpose she'd been given. Or maybe she'd done that a long time ago and after her return been living on borrowed time. With the choice she had made, she would not last long until her peril anyway. If there was anything she could still do, one more act of a Jedi, the time had come.  
  
Milions of parsecs away, in a transparisteel-ceilinged corridor heavy, grey rain poured down soaking sentients outside and dampening the spirits of those dispersing from a conference room in a less-used wing of the former Imperial Palace. Many suggestions had been made through the years to rename the construction of black marble and transparisteel, but the Imperial-era name had stuck.  
  
The small group abandoning the command room consisted mostly of military insignia uniforms or plain woven robes. These were the insiders, the new rebels against the backforces of yesterday's rebellion against the Empire. The New Republic Senate existed now only in title, a chaotic group of bickering politicians. The insiders had grown weary of them, and before long they had an outlaw alliance in a galaxy slowly losing its laws.  
  
The first to pace down the corridor, red locks of hair trailing in her wake, was Mara Jade Skywalker. She cut a corner in a sharp turn, and disappeared toward the turbolifts.  
  
Luke Skywalker was only rising from his chair, deep in thought.  
  
Her sister touched his arm. "You'll talk to Corran about the shipments?"  
  
Luke gazed up, disoriented for a second. He nodded, making a mental note to get in touch with Leia later and ask what on Earth she'd been talking about. He was aware the subject must've been pressing - probably to do with Eclipse - but he'd learned to prioritize certain things even before his Jedi duties.  
  
One thing, to be precise, and that would be Mara.  
  
The realization had crept up to him slowly in the course of their battles with the Yuuzhan Vong. The Jedi were protectors of the galaxy and its sentients, but on a personal level, he had to have a reason to want to hold onto that debt.  
  
When he'd married he had been aware that the thought of losing Mara would prove to be quite an obstacle and depriver of peace, but life without her would... not be life at all.  
  
If only Mara hadn't been complicating things even more.  
  
Luke stood up, gathered his robes - a hem was caught under a chair leg, and went to turn of the lights as he was the last one in the room. It was a miracle Leia had managed to find them a conference room. Officially, the Jedi were not linked to the military, thus the meeting would've raised a lot of alarms in the powers-that-be. This place was secure, in the unrenovated section of the Palace and noone was likely to stumble in, but Leia'd obviously been walking on coals nonetheless. It was her neck on the line.  
  
Luke sighed. He knew what awaited him.  
  
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Thank you for reading. Reviews and feedback would be greatly appreciated - they're the fuel that feeds this creative furnace.  
  
Heidi Ahlmen siirma6@surfeu.fi 


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars or any of the characters. I am not making money with this.  
  
Only to be archived at Fanfiction.net. All other sites: email me first at siirma6@surfeu.fi to gain permission.  
  
Notes: I apologize for the fact that this story remains unfinished. SW is not my forte - my SW works only mark a period in my writing career when I simply did not have enough inspiration to carry on with my Tomb Raider writings.  
  
Star Wars: Excess Mercy by Heidi Ahlmen  
  
Mara pregnant. Luke couldn't quite remember ever feeling equally confused as to the moment the truth had dawned on him. But a certain clarity had crept in very soon, a determination of what was right and what they should do. Luke was certain they'd made the right decision by seeing it through.  
  
To Mara this clarity of vision still had obviously not occurred. She'd partially contended with their decision, but due to his Force-sense Luke knew Mara was in pain even though she was physically fine. All this - the war, the losses - were proving to be a hard bargain for all of them as they'd been there before. The rebellion. They were used to fighting incredible odds and still prevailing.  
  
Mara had led quite a different life. After Endor she'd disappeared into the crowd, only caring for herself - no philosophy, no ties, no loyalties before Karrde, and that was entrepreneurism, not galaxy-spanning responsibility. This she could not escape alone. The Vong were everywhere.  
  
Occasionally she acted as though Luke was a burden to her, a rope that kept her tied up, preventing her from taking off in the Sabre and plotting a course to the unknown territories. Luke she could escape to a certain extent, but the bud of a life she carried inside she could not rip out.  
  
And on a deep level Luke could feel that blinking out that little light was the last thing she would do. Through the Force Luke felt the fierceness that Mara protected their child with, even though it was still only a cluster of cells, nothing visible.  
  
On the outside, though, he could not feel Mara at all. This war was taking its toll on him as well. He needed her, but she turned away.  
  
And recently, she'd began behaving in a way that worried him to the core. Momentarily, she would be lost in thought, her breathing heavy. Then she would leave - "to get some fresh air", and as she executed her retreat into solitude Luke could feel a storm stirring, a black holish desperation, confusion and fear that made her nearlt double over physically.  
  
He'd tried confronting her, tried just being there, tried holding her silently, tried giving her some space. It wasn't the fact that Mara was unhappy that hurt him, but how she treated him afterwards.  
  
Like nothing had happened. Like he was the culprit if he even dared to try to speak to her about it. After each of these fits - what else could he call them - Mara simply gathered herself, slammed up her mental shields and returned to her duties. And everytime, the seclusion from him ran a little deeper, alienated her a little more.  
  
He was at their apartment door now. And decided to go in. He was tired, and lived there as well, in case she did not remember.  
  
Before pressing his hand onto the keyplate for a pattern scan he closed his eyes and made a quiet survey of the rooms with the Force. The link between him and Mara had been strong enough for them to easily feel each other across planetary systems, but a little extra concentration never hurt.  
  
Mara was inside, in the kitchen unit. She occupied herself with preparing a meal, trying to keep calm, aware of his presence.  
  
The door slid open and Luke went in, pressing his lips upward to form a friendly smile. "Hi."  
  
Mara looked up for a nanosecond, then knelt down to rummage through a kettle cabinet. "Have you seen the medium-sized sautéing pan?"  
  
Luke walked up the the counter and leaned on it. "Mara, you don't have to cook. How about if we go out to to that little restaurant that just around the corner from Freedom Square on 25th level?"  
  
"Not in the mood, Skywalker." At least she admitted to that.  
  
Mara closed the closet doors and looked disoriented.  
  
"There's some leftovers in the cooling unit," Luke offered.  
  
Mara opened it, dug out a container, and attacked it without bothering to warm the contents.  
  
A sudden chill ran over Luke. What was happening? He felt like lashing out at Mara for doing this, for making him feel so transparent, so inexistant, for digging out that loner bravado again.  
  
If she wanted to address her, the time would be now.  
  
"Did you find a dress for the evening?" he asked more cheerfully than he intended, aggravated at himself for not plucking up the courage to stand that fight that would ensue if she cornered Mara.  
  
But he was aware that there weren't many who would contradict his decision. Cornering Mara Jade was no sensible thing to do unless you wished for a quick, clean demise.  
  
Mara nodded, then retreated to the bedchamber, closing the door in her wake. He felt a slight pang of guilt from her directed towards him. Maybe she was in the mood for talking after all.  
  
He knew could go in, kiss her, let the kiss lead into something more, but that would just be himself using physical closeness to alleviate his own helplessness. Mara would be a passive participant.  
  
It was like making love to a hollow shell.  
  
They were attending a concert that evening, a charity thing organized by Leia in the name of the Senate. She was no longer given any crucial jobs, not with her association with the Jedi, and Luke admired her sister's ability to hold her head high and tend to even the most trivial of matters with regal responsibility.  
  
She'd considered consulting Leia about Mara. perhaps it was something about women and being pregnant. But something in Mara gave him the sense that this was something between the two of them.  
  
He sat down on the couch. The sound of rain outside mixed with the turmoil he could sense from the next room.  
  
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Thank you for reading. Reviews and feedback would be greatly appreciated - they're the fuel that feeds this creative furnace.  
  
Heidi Ahlmen siirma6@surfeu.fi 


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